You are so right Mari, I don't think these things would have hit me so hard that have been going on if I had something better then just elavil in my system which is all I've got until today. Abilify doesn't touch depression as far as I have seen, but what it does I am grateful for. I really hope things get better in a few days, I just feel so wretched, I mean I was stable and not depressed for years, but now that we've been mesing with my meds I just feel awful emotionally.

It's okay though she wants to help me with being a little manic, I mean lets face it you can't just cough up a full novel in two weeks like I did in August without a little mania. I know I get that way and usually that's all I do, is write, write and write some more. And the depression part of it never usually hit me, until I weaned off the wellbutrin, she felt and I agree because I was getting racing thoughts again, that it was triggering mania so we d/c'd it and talked about paxil. SO hopefully it will help me, if not I'll recognize it by our next apt and we'll try something else.

So sorry your office mate is having such a rough time, his pdoc sounds completely incompetant and making his suffer for nothing. If only he would have heard you when you said he needed to get a new pdoc when you brought it up, that's too bad, but you're not at all responsible for him so you're doing the right thing for you...so don't harbor any guilt about it, you did more then anyone else would have in regards to offering advice to him. I'd do the same, it's time to move on and ignore it and has been for a long while now.

As for our weekend, well I am feeling better today and think we'll have a fabulous time at walmart and wendy's with my mother, we're going to go to the library as we always do, run my recycling stuff by the place that you take it to and drop off some clothes by the church that we donate old clothes to. Tomorrow my little boy is eleven! LOL! He's growing up so fast, puberty is almost here and I am confused about it, HOW are we going to get him through it I wonder? I know it's getting better, he's hearing and understanding us better, but still I don't know how deeply that runs, you know? HOW much he really gets or not.

The other night at dinner I was totally sure Jack was out of his mind asking Jackie to get him a packet of parmesean cheese from the pizza place in the drawer we keep stuff like that in, we were sitting down and Jackie was still standing and by God he went and fiddling around in the drawer for about a minute, me still convinced he won't get it, and he got it!!! I was so stunned by it but it made me realize he is capable of more then I sometimes give him credit for. BIg lesson for me let me tell ya. Jack was all, "I just treat him like a regular kid because that's what he is..." and maybe he's right, I just am very opver protective over him and his feelings, but anyway, that's what our weekend looks like so far, today out with Granny and tomorrow cupcakes with whipped topping for icing.