Well another Friday, I'm amazed that I care what day it is. Well, I guess I don't really, just a way to keep track of time that I am not doing anything with.

Alffe, "It" the big elephant in the room that everybody is afraid to talk about. I hate thinking about it, but it does seem that it is the only solution. No, I don't have the courage and I feel terrible thinking that way, as I know what it's like to be a survivor of suicide and I douldn't put that on family and friends. Yep it hurts my heart to know that's it's been over a year since anybody's come b to say hi, but I've probably shoved them away. I just know that I think of ways constantly.

Doody, I agree with you, at least if you have the money you can appreciate it. I think if you've always had money then you tend not to appreciate the basic things in life that it provides for you (and the not so basic ) Not sure what will happen soon, as bills are due and no money to pay them.

Alffe, I got rid of 90% of Michael's clothes, that was pretty basic. It's all of his book, the encylopedias, just all the things that he loved. They were special to him or us, now who wants them. I probably won't have any room on my shopping cart anyway. I've been going through things and it's so much easier for me to get rid of my things than his. I don't know, I do know that I am really, really tired of being sad.

Thank you all for kindness and tender words, it means so much to me.