I Won

Today I played golf, but not very well
I hooked all the balls, my partner will tell
My driving was poor, sometimes out of sight
The fairways were slim, the greens wouldn’t bite

Long game or short play, no matter of which
My irons were rusty, my putter a twitch
Not one single par or birdie did make
I went in some bunkers and many did rake

In woods and in fields my topflight did go
It was quite windy, I should have kept low
We hired a buggy of battery power
It’s a good job we did, it started to shower

On went the wet proofs, to stifle our swing
A nice slug of brandy I forgot to bring
The sun didn’t wink for the rest of the day
Was breezy and cold, restricting our play

The 19th beaconed , our throats were too dry
We were so bloody cold we wanted to cry
The last green was here , I looked at my line
A forty foot putt, or fifty was mine

I hit the ball firm and followed it through
It went in the hole, expletives they flew
From partner came words, you don’t want to hear
The drinks were on him, the whiskies and beer.

listerine