((((((BF)))))),



Oh, believe me -- I know all about those dang labels they slap on you.

We've got three forums here that would 'fit' you (there's that word again ):
Anxiety and OCD
Survivors of Suicide
Bipolar Disorder

If you go strictly by diagnosis, then Anxiety and OCD would be the place for you.

I'm a big believer, though, that all of us who suffer with chemical dysfunctions in our brains can use all the help we can get. People with Bipolar understand the symptoms that you talk about -- they live with them every day. Plus, they're sort of "cousins" to me. My labels are chronic major depression and borderline personality disorder (that's the label from 7734 ). Bipolar and BPDs have a lot of 'issues', again with anxiety, but, also with with relationships and with boundaries

The Suicide Survivors forum. Also, one of "my" places. I've been on both sides of suicide. Lost a younger brother 41 years ago to suicide. And attempted suicide myself 7 times (one for every year of my marriage). Suicide Survivors know all about "coping".

You should get to know the people well in all three of those places. They're all gonna have lessons for you that you need to learn.

You must be "younger". I can't believe that you couldn't get SSDI with the diagnoses that you have. Usually, SSDI is awarded for psychiatric disorders. Luckily, I've got such a combination of crap wrong with me that I was able to get SSDI within 4 months. I've talked with people over-and-over again that end up in that whole appeal-refile-appeal routine. You have to have good backup from your doctors. They have to be willing to write letters stating how this is affecting your life. The records are not enough. Records are often not right. And, to be perfectly frank, I doubt very much that the government reads all those records. They need a summary on top of the record that will entice them to read the record further -- that's what the letters from the doctors are for.

There are an awful lot of "things" available to us who suffer with psychiatric illnesses. I was in the Prozac study 20 years ago. I thank G-d for Prozac. I never would have made it this far without it. I take Effexor XR now. That works well on my physical pain and not as well on my brain. I've just gone into a clinical trial for Sam-e to see if it will boost the effectiveness of Effexor XR -- it seems to This is the first week that I've felt HAPPY in months

There are a lot of things being tested in clinical trials. Drugs, techniques. I'm a big believer in clinical trials. I was in the Prozac study for 2 years. I was in a Cymbalta study for about a month -- got kicked out 'cause it didn't work that great on my depression, but, it did lead me to Effexor SR and a MOST EXCELLENT treatment for fibromyalgia and neuropathic pain.

http://public.murl.com/moose53/HEALT...LINICAL_TRIALS -- Clinical trials bookmarks -- (press the [page-down] key four times to get to the appropriate section)

I've got a whole HERD of bookmarks related to psychiatric "issues":
http://public.murl.com/moose53/HEALT...TRY-PSYCHOLOGY (press the [page-down] key four times to get to the appropriate section)

I've also got quite a few regarding Holistic-Healing:
http://public.murl.com/moose53/HEALT...LISTIC-HEALING (press the [page-down] key three times)

Because we have screwed-up brain chemistry, we're saddled with figuring out how to live good lives in spite of all the crap. It's hard, but, it's doable. We have to do a LOT of hard work to help ourselves. The technology just hasn't gotten as far as it should have by now. We have to understand how we react to stimuli and why (if we can figure that out). Writing -- journal-keeping is an invaluable tool for figuring out WHY we do the things that we do. We need to make sure that, if a particular therapy is not working, we do not waste our time continuing with that particular therapy.

There are good doctors our there and bad doctors. I've fired the bad ones. And owe my life to one of the good ones.

You need to understand yourself and your diagnosis. You need to learn tips and tricks and techniques for calming yourself. You can't stay in a frantic state 24/7 -- not good for you.

It's a lot of hard work. But, as I said, it's doable.

You DESERVE a chance at a good life. You have to become extremely, shall we say "FORCEFUL" so that no one crosses your boundaries and so that no doctor ignores you.

You might also want to be hanging around in the Social Security forum. Read the messages. Get yourself SMART. So you can apply again and WIN this time.

Hugs.

Barb