thank you so much. yes, the holidays will be tough. fathers day was spent in tears. he passed away in the local hospice unit. they have a support group that meets every thursday. i attend that. most of the time i spend is with my mother. she lives with me now. she seems to have lost her will and enjoyment of the things that she used to do. i know that it is hard on her, they were married almost 44 years. i have tried to take her with me but she does not wish to go anywhere. i now have to give her insulin twice a day. she used to inject herself. they say that i have not grieved myself. i have taken the time to help everyone else adjust and with their grief that i did not grieve myself. this may be true but i do not think so. my heart is still broken just as it was the frist night he was gone.