hey paula,
accck i've had a few meltdowns meself. lol
not an easy thing to go through, some of the meds like sinemet cause various problems either in conjunction with other meds (like requip, mirapex, comtan) or solo. ya know, dyskensias, dystonias, clouded thinking, sometimes impaired judgements, ya know consequences don't have the same meaning they may have before. partially side-effects and partially due to the low dopamine levels.

along with with fluctutations, the levels of dopamine aren't at a steady or equalized level, it kind of plays havoc with emotions, happy to sad and everything in between.

at peak dopamine levels, you may get more tremors, dyskenias, (running, kicking, i call it swimming, lol) flapping, flailing, waving, finger and toe curling, when you bottom out the dystonia, bradykenis, rigidity, masking, drooling, hoping you get to the bath room on time, sets in. the longer you deal with the meds, the more you have to learn to listen to your body. trying to remember the meds side-effects without fearing them or allowing them to be a crutch, so to speak, acck you know me, i can be a perfect a-hole all by myself, lol .

for me, learning to tweak to your body's demands is much more difficult than trying to live up to my emotional wants- trying to function at a considerably higher level than i may be physically or realisticly able to. a learning curve, a cycle, if you will. constantly adjusting, fine tuning, no surrender, little to no room to be complacent. i dunno, it's almost of like trying to be vigilent without obsessing, lol

i reckon it's because i'm one of those people who is sensitive to protiens, haven't eaten eggs in like 4 years, poultry and pork white meats effectively cancel out my meds. eggs and egg whites are in just about everything, even candy bars, acccck reading food labels at the grocery store, lol

i dunno if any of this makes sense to anybody besides me,lol
take care
tammy