Songs for Pain by Nazik Malaeka

[This is a very poor attempt of translation from Arabic by me] . It is part of a longer poem written by the poet while trying to deal with the pain of loss of her dear mother.
I quote this poem, which I read a very long time ago because it helped a little with my own pain hoping it will help others.
..............


His gifts in the night are
burning sadness and sleepless eyes.
We found him on our road in a rainy day,
And we only gave him from our love a gentle tap and a small corner in the heart.

Then, he stayed with us,
Never departing or disappearing from our way,
Following us in this wide universe wherever we go.
I wish that we never met him in that dreary morning,
and never gave him a drop of our love,
He, whose gifts are burning sadness and sleepless nights.
1-----
From where does pain come?
From where?
Since a long time, it made friends of our visions and nourished our songs.
---
Yesterday we took him to the side of the lake,
There, we shredded him and threw him to the water wave,
Not a sigh or a tear remained,
We thought we were safe from his harm,
No longer he colored our smiles with sadness,
Or hid the bitter chokes in our songs.
---
Then we received a red rose with warm fragrance,
Our lovers sent it over the seas,
What did we expect in it?, but joy and happiness??
But it shook and bled hot thirsty tears in our fingers.
Oh ! Pain ! We love you !

2---
From where does pain come?
From where?
Since a long time, it made friends of our visions and nourished our songs.
We are for him the thirst and mouth,
He lives and we drink.
---3
Can we not overcome the pain?
Postpone it to the next morning or evening?
Be busy from it. by a game , a song or an old story with a forgotten tune?
---
I wonder who this pain may be?
A small child with questioning eyes?
Calmed by a kind tab and lullaby which make him sleep?
--
You who gave us tears and regret !
Who else closed his heart to our sorrow?
then came back crying to love him?
Who else sow the wounds and smiled?
--
This child ! his harm is innocent !
Our loving enemy or hateful friend !
The dagger which ask us to lay our cheeks !
Without a scream or pain!
---
Oh small child ! we forgave you truly and wholly
Although you made our eyes a river of tears
And ached our wounds in many places
Yes we forgave you since a long time !