That back when we lived in smaller more intimate communities, and there
was no telephone, daily paper, etc..TV people relied on each other for support and it was natural. We still see this in the community we live in during the
summers-- 500 residents total over a large area.

She said now in her therapy, she sees more professionals of both sexes, who
do not get married, and live alone. I saw this in North Carolina, for example and mentioned it to her. The cars on the freeway there specifically at Reasearch Triangle Park, were all driven by single people. (in the outskirts this changes). So were the subdivisions.

So today we are more independent and get help over the phone, online and watch TV for news etc. So we have less needs than folks did 100yrs ago. I think this tends to isolate people and compartmentalize feelings. I have also noticed that people won't easily talk to you if you are in a long line at the store. I get them going every time..and then they typically do relax. It is kind of odd, really. Why not talk about something interesting and make the time pass better? How simple, but nope...they are typically in some invisible bubble!

Where we live in a changing very upscale neighborhood (which was not always this extreme) --people don't even go OUTSIDE! They flick open their garage door opener and go into the "cave" of the garage and close up after themselves. After most of our neighbors of long ago moved out, there are people now I have NEVER seen living in many houses. We don't have block parties anymore, and these newcomers are very unpleasant and trendy. I don't miss them at all. Once a new gal stopped in her car while I was working on the yard, and asked me..."how much do these folks pay you to keep this garden?" I said I do it myself! She was stunned. And we are one of the very few with flowers etc in front publicly.

I raised my son very carefully. I didn't want him to have doctor phobias, be afraid of hospitals etc. When he was 4 he had ENT surgery, and they provided a walk thru to desensitize the kids...it was called Surgical Safari. He did very well, no episodes or meltdowns then or when he had his surgery. He was nice at the doctors, all the time, even for his glasses. Then one day when he was out of high school he mentioned casually that he would freak if he ever had to go the ER or whatever...he is terrified of doctors! WHOA--- where did THAT come from? Even taking his pet cats to the vet stresses him out. How did that happen? I guess it was there all along? No matter how casual and non anxious I was with him, etc. ( are these feelings from the 15 days he was in the hospital after being born? does he somehow have that fear squirreled away?)

So people are complex... no simple answers for most things!