Peta,
I totally agree with #1, this is something she and I are going to have to work out. I used to get a communication notebook...but so help me they would write stuff I could care less about, and not stuff I needed to hear. It sort of started as more of a notebook about what he ate that day, then, when I complained I wasn't being informed enough turned into a book that sort of tattled on Vince.

#2, yes that was worded in a way that gives one of those 'read between the lines' encoded messages, I have to figure that one out. It was worded oddly, yes, but it was telling (I just don't know what it's telling me yet).

I love how you put #3, hee hee. From what little time I've spent with her, her idea of empathy does feel a bit like keeping warm with an ice cube. I still have to get to know her better, and hope I'm wrong. She seems highly defensive in person, so that might explain the ice cube feeling...but being highly defensive is not productive, but maybe she has to get to know me??? I dunno yet.

Number 4...I forgot about his 'spot' under the table with books and pillows. Just that alone, made me feel better...I didn't realize he'd still have it this year, I thought it was just any old table they told him to go under like he was a bad dog or something.

We had a communication notebook. Last year though we didn't start one, and I didn't ask. I was glad we didn't seem to need it, glad I didn't have the knot in my stomach before reading it, and glad I didn't have to write my little essay every night. I honestly sort of attempted to take a break from IEP-land and autism last year since his behavior was better overall. I was so glad not to be getting calls from school almost daily, I reached a point where I was glad for the break and didn't care that I wasn't involved and didn't care that I shouldn't 'take a break' from being his mom. I wanted to be involved in the good news, but was sick of hearing the bad which was always in abundance. I really do feel I've had continual trouble getting the scoop on how his day is...the FULL scoop. God help me, last year they stopped communicating and I stopped asking. He was with folks that he'd been with for years, so I was like 'whew' and basically stopped (continually) being involved and was only involved on a need to be basis. So, that much I have to admit. When he was at school, I often felt like "your problem!". I feel like I now get the bad mother of the year award, but it's like alls I do is fight and fight. I'm sick of it. Cause too often, it's with folks that don't share my philosophy, so it's a no win situation. Last year though, he was with people that were great, and I was only to happy to be in the dark and let them 'deal' with him. That's how it felt at the time anyhow. But, with a new case manager, I guess I have to get up and running again. I really did feel in the dark even when I was highly involved. But, now with some RDI under my belt, I feel much more sure of what he needs, so I can be more involved. Hopefully, we can all work together (the new case manager and I). I don't like her, I don't have to, and maybe that first impression will change, but if she can do well by my child she will have my cooperation, support and respect and thanks. Ya know? I didn't like the teacher my daughter had for 3 stinkin years, but Carmen did and did well with her so that was plenty good enough for me.

Well, anyhow, I'll have to see how tomorrow goes. BTW, I asked her to print the stuff out cause my printer is broken...actually the cable has dissappeared. And I don't eeeeeeeeeeven have to ask who took it. Hmph.

Oh and thanks for words about the dog. What can I say? It's her time. It sucks, I could go on and on about all the negatives...but it's her time. If she can't have a quality life, I want her to have a quick and peaceful death. I'm prepared, the kids are prepared. There'll be tears, but there are so many memories and positives to think about. She wasn't hit by a car or poisoned or lost never to be found, she's dying of old age. I can't imagine being without her after so long. She's been the best most loyal devoted friend I ever had. I hope she can either live the life she would want, or have the ending she would want. She will not die shivering in fear at the vet's office. I couldn't stand her going out like that. Anyhow, that's not on the table until I talk to the vet again tomorrow, to see if her new meds should be working yet, or if she should start the last (of three) meds.