Robbo,
I'm also new to this forum and have similar problems (in my 40's, major arm probs, can't work, lots of pain). You sound really, really down. I don't know if it helps to have someone halfway around the world say this but want to let you know that I hear and I care. I imagine you're scared as I am. I'm glad we both found this forum. Hang in there-- we were both going to make it.