I like the teachers reply, every bit of it. The thing under the desk sounds very reasonable and makes a lot of sense in the right context. The fact that she said appropriate male vs. adult is very good as well. He is not an adult, and is not expected to act like on. he is a male and there are different expectations in a males behavior (boundraries) then in a females. So, itsall good to me.

I do think that maybe (don't kill me, or have me killed) that you could be creating a monster. (Am I agreeing with you?) I have clients who do this sort of behavior, they know they will get a staff member to stick up for them when they tell them what happened.. but they leave out little details that change the entire situation. They use this to split staff and get what they want. I also know a lot of aspergers kids who do the same thing. I think its the result of us trying so hard to protect them and advocate for them.

I think by going to the class you will be feeding into Vinces illusion of how the world is. I say this not just for the teachers sake; who will be walking around your child like bare feet on eggshell not to upset you. You and he will also suffer for it long after this teacher is gone.

If Vince sees that he can control/create/alter a situation he will do the same too you, and ... thats just an awful place for him to be.

Whether he is doing it intentionally, by luck or coincidence its all the same in the end. At some point he will know that this behavior gets people to react.