((((((Nikko)))))),

WOW!!

I never until about 20 years ago realized how much damage my father's drinking did to our family.

He was a "good" drunk. Never missed work. Never hurt anyone. It depressed him and he fell asleep. AND, we had to be quiet when he was asleep. No friends allowed in the house. What a ****-head.

I made a conscious decision in 1990 that I would never drink again. Even though the only drinking that i ever did was a glass of sherry once in awhile with my sister-in-law (maybe one glass once a month). But, I was attending a group for adult child of alcoholics and it seemed rather ridiculous to let anything into my life that had done so much damage.

I can see that a lot of the personality 'defects' that my brother and my half-brother and I ended up with have their roots in alcoholism. I'm assuming there were other things too. It isn't always only one thing in a family that causes problems. It's when the whole confluence of them come together that you see ####.

It's kind of a wake-up call when you see it down on paper like that, isn't it Just know that every decision that you made because alcohol was involved was a decision that probably kept you safe. You don't have to live "INSIDE OF" or "WITH" these decisions anymore.



Barb