I totally feel the pain in your writing. That has to be hard on you to hear that from someone you loved. You just need to remember it's his loss. One of these days you will get through what you are going through and find someone better for you.

I lost Bill a little over a year ago so I do know what it's like to feel totally alone. I still do. I rely on my kids and friends to help me through the hard times and they seem to come through. As Terry said, go with them if you can and watch them doing those things and laugh and enjoy your friends as much as you can.

I don't know how your RSD is but I do know if you don't have it under control then it's hard to enjoy anything. First I think a person has to get it under control a lot. When I first got down with RSD, I couldn't do anything.

I don't know how old you are nor what hobbies you have but maybe you can find some hobbies to do at home to keep you busy.

Hang around here and everyone will try to keep you company.

Ada