Hi, my mom killed herself six weeks after my dad died, just when I thought I had gotton her stable enough to go back for a quick trip to my house on the west coast after spending several months taking care of them. Because the coroner was away on a weekend, they sent a substitute who was drunk and put down undetermined instead of suicide, thinking he was doing a favor. But when a dectective started questioning me, I realized that it had reached the lunacy of me being a "suspect" since I ripped the bag off her head to see if she was alive...
however, I never got blamed really, not by friends and family like you, so unfairly. I have to hope that you don't let it get to you. If you can find a couple who will go out to dinner with you and your husband, you won't have to feel so sad for his loss. There must be some people out there who don't need to have a bad guy for every tragedy! Maybe someone in a different age group than yours - I found that once I started getting friends that were much older and much younger than me, I started to like the west coast after being uprooted from Boston. Maybe it was just correlation and not causation, but I've always felt that when we got to know some people who wouldn't have normally become friends with each other was when I started to stop missing my home state so much.
I'm glad to hear that you have gotton on with your life and have the wonder of a child. You certainly are as normal as can be, don't worry about that LOL! Both you and smiles are wise. I love your quotes. Have a great day.
Jane