I wish I could offer some suggestions but right now I can't. If you are spiritual then maybe you can focus on we don't understand the whys and even if we could control everything we would probably get it wrong anyways...lol...
the refrigerator sounds awful....do you think there could be a dead mouse under there or is that too simple?
I am so sorry about your feelings of sadness...crying is great...it releases toxins....
I hope you feel better soon.
Bobby