Sandy.. I just read your posts. Very touching. I've not been online due to computer problems and did lose prior reply... trying again.....

I too hope more carers will post & share here...
I 've been more active at other Forums for my medical problems. I"m one of those "sick" people caring for Loved One and continually deal w/ challenges of how to maintain

I've been primary livein carer for both parents for 6 yrs.
my mother died last year.
my father has several disabling medical conditions; was bedridden for years but now can go in motorized wheelchair, after assistance to transfer.
He needs help w/ most activities of daily living but is aware, alert & a sweetheart. doesn't complain, feels like he's a "burden" because of his needs.
we've gotten some help but may need more. to keep him living in his home..
more details later... he's 86...

few years ago my father had a suprapubic catheter; in concept at that time it sounded great (he had Foley catheter and got UTI's frequently) but it did not work for him. problems w/ leaks and continued UTI's . Urologist pulled it. took weeks to heal, and stop leaking urine from that site. it was awful.

despite our experiences it could be good option. Interogate urologist fullly before agreeing to surgery for it. (risks, complications, care, etc.)
there are some catheters with silver (expensive) but said to prevent frequent UTi's...
when my dad got UTI's he get very sick-physically and several times became delusional, w/ hallucinations.
he hasn't had UTI's since, but it is a concern as are kidney issues and other med problems that continue to be watched, monitored .
He recently had some infection, or virus--DR was concerned about pnemonia . He's still not feeling well but not worse. He has major problems w/ bodywide edema. Feet/legs most visibly affected. CHF seems culprit.

He went into Renal failure few years ago, but never had dialysis. after hospitalization, spent few months in nursing home for rehab. He returned home stornger from intensive PT , OT and other therapies.

He is a very determined man and put himself on a bladder [re]training program. He now usually knows when he has to go and asks for assistance, but sometimes doesn't or make it in time. We use incontinent products
Skin breakdown is a concern .

some aspects & realities of caregiving.... advocacy is also vital....
I could go on, but hope more will be discussed in future...about various issues, concerns; for sharing and support...

I pray you can care for your h/b. and don't get sick. Caregiving is notorious for that, whether the streses or that many carers don't take good care of self....

perhaps can/willl share more ....

wishing you all the best...