Thank you for the compliment.
I'm sorry to hear about your husband. What a stressful time this must be.
I spent several years getting my education, only to be struck down in my prime (age 31). I continued to work for 14 yrs, but I had to down-grade my career aspirations very early on, and that was a blow. It was even harder when I had to leave the workforce all together, so I understand your "unfinished business" feeling.
I tend to be the caretaker type too, probably because I didn't get that in my own home. My mom was schizophrenic (in a bad way) and my dad, who was a drunk, died when I was eleven. I want to do so much for my kids, to give them the very best opportunities in life, but I simply can't.
There are two things that have helped me accept my limitations; all of us kids (my sisters and I) survived our difficult home situation well, and my Grandmother raised 18 kids that all turned out fine. Every time I think of what I would like to be able to do for my kids, I ask myself "if I had 18 kids, would I be able to do that?". Clearly the answer is "no" . . . and since I know first hand that children can prosper without being "taken care of" . . . I know my kids will be fine too.
It's time to take care of you, so that you will be healthy enough to spoil the grand-children (every other Sunday

) for many years to come.
Cherie
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I am not a Neurologist, Physician, Nurse, or Hairdresser ... but I have learned that it is not such a great idea to give oneself a haircut after three margaritas
.