Quote:
Originally Posted by Looking4hope
NO, I mean it. I don't care anymore. I don't care if I walk this planet anymore. I don't care about nothing. I'm tired of trying. I'm tired of not being heard. I'm tired of empty promises. I tired of being hurt. I tired of being me. I'm tired of people that don;t really understand.
I'm mad at God. I doubt that there is a God anymore. I don't know why he continues to let me go through this agony. I got well for this. I'm so well that the emotions are ready to explode inside of me. I'm tired of people being afraid of me because of how deeply I feel. Do I scare people away? Are they afraid because they don't know how to help? What did I do wrong? Why is it that it's always my fault? Why do I chase people I love away? What's wrong with me? Why don't I believe in myself?
Why? Why? Why?
I can't stand the pain anymore....
Where is my comfort?
Tell me where?
Please tell me...
I want to know.
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Looking4hope I care if you walk in this world. I look forward to seeing your rainbow and reading your posts.
I know how it feels to be tired of trying, I often wonder why life has to be so hard so often? But I guess for me I see the pain and hardship as reminders to be thankful for the good times.
Being hurt sucks but we all get hurt and thats how we find our strength to heal. It helps us appreciate those who lift us up and keep their promises.
I often think how wonderful it would be to be someone else but then I remember that no matter how pretty someone else's life looks from the outside I don't know what goes on behind closed doors.
As for God thats a tuff one, we come to our own beliefs about that. But I get angry at him too.
Believing in yourself is not easy but with little steps it gets easier and eventually becomes natural.
Don't be so hard on yourself it's not always your fault even when others tell us it is.
Life is scary but it is also so rewarding.
I hope you feel better soon and know I'm thinking of you!
