Originally Posted by Tootsie

Well, this is interesting.

Our pasts do live within us to the extent we want them to. I had a pretty nice childhood, but certainly how we are brought up does reflect our lives later to one extent or another.

If you don't let go of your mother's power over you then she is always the winner. Aren't you worth something all by yourself?

I think about people who were POW's and how they (some of them) move on. Some do not; they cannot let go.

I can't say why that is.

I'm sure counseling makes you revisit your childhood to the extent you are uncomfortable. However, your childhood is past and you are now free of that and can move on. What do you want to move on too?

Yes, the world can be scary and also critical. You have to be aware of your surroundings and take some precautions, but if you stand back and think for awhile you will know when to take a step in the right direction.

Keep your faith in yourself; don't place too much faith in others being perfect. They are not, so if you tend to think someone is you might be disappointed.

I know someone who always jumps in and then always gets burned. This person tends to see people she admires in a glowing aura and then if they step out of the glow she gets discouraged and down on them.

Think of taking little steps, not big leaps. You are owed nothing to compensate for the bad childhood so move on from it as best you can. Learn a way to banish bad memories by replacing them or the urge to think of them with a pleasant though. Even if it's thinking about eating a piece of your favorite chocolate or the scent of a beautiful rose.

Don't be unsocial. At least try being friendly, try having fun. Do something entirely for others without expectation of reward.

Good Luck.

Tootsie