Today is a bad day because the CFS depression is acting up (it's different from the bipolar depression).


Hubby told me that he told one of my male colleagues that I can't handle teaching or other responsibilities early in the morning. He said that I stay up very late and that having to be in to work at 8:00 am is difficult and that it "messes" me "up for the rest of the day" and I won't be able to do my other job duties that day and so forth.

Before hubby told, it was a well known secret -- my group already knew about it and we never talk about it in front of me.
THAT IS HOW I WANTED IT.
That's my business and my choice.


Hubby thinks it is better to tell people that something is going on than to let them think that I am shirking responsibilities. Maybe hubby didn't know that my group already knows. Maybe he was trying to be helpful.

I'm not feeling helped.

I'm angry and sad. Feel betrayed.

Mostly, I feel shame about being sick.

I'm making a guess that some people withOUT bipolar also suffer from varying degrees of sleep problems. But it is not the same . . . no stigma attached to honest simple text-book insomnia.

And I don't know who to deal with being in at 8:00 am tomorrow.

Freaking out.
M.


And yeah, I know that he was being protective because he is ****** about how the boss is dumping extra stuff on my group now, but, even so, I am still teed off.