After my run of illnesses and surgeries and going through this for 20 years, I am still asking this at times. I was so frustrated a couple of weeks ago, I told my Dr. that the damn Drs. think we should just stay like we are. It seems like it seems normal to them.

Of course, he took it to heart and I had to apologize to him. He has worked his *** off to save my life and take care of me when the 100 of other Drs. I have seen have said live with it all. I guess like Vicc said, I don't have it in me to give up.

Depression does come with RSD. I think everyone dealing with RSD deals with depression. I have an implant in me for depression and even with it on, I get depressed even more when my pain level is at it's highest. I stood by the fridge last week and thought I should just kill myself.

If I weren't in councelling, I wouldn't be here today. I do think people need help to deal with the pain levels we suffer. On those days when the pain is above reproach, we need it more.

I do hope you find some help in dealing with the depression of this. Yes we have our families. I have a great one, yes we have our friends, I'm blessed with them too, but we still have the most unbearable pain it seems that can be put on anyone. They can't help us with that part. As I said, we need help to talk about it and try to get through it.

Ada