little mike (my friend with severe autism) has a similar issue. he likes to touch and hug too many times. well one of our techniques to teach him (he is 21) are quick little spurts of words that we use regularly around him. always saying the same exact words. i.e. can't hug too long, don't touch a light, ask to touch, etc. etc. he ends up saying the little short scentences to himself like he is trying to remember it. and when we use the words he enjoys relating that he knows what i am saying.

i don't know why your school doesn't want to teach him. most autistics i have met love to learn as long as it is presented in a form that they can relate to. which for the most part means to present the information in a way that they enjoy and can conversate or react positively with. little mike has the same problem with the amount of pressure he engages when he is touching. heck now that i think about it, i had a similar issue when hugging family i would squeze so hard i would try to pick them up. not sure why? but it might corrilate to the enjoyment of pressure that some autistics get. heck sometimes little mike will grab my arm and wont let go. and he is darn tootin strong i tell you what. so that is why we say ask to touch etc. or don't touch strangers and stuff.

does seem stupid that the school isn't even trying to help him. no matter what they should enforce new techniques that don't involve touching that would satisfy his social requirements and feelings. like if you can't hug then what about trying to relate specific (exactly the same) words that he may use that can help him deal with his current situation. if he would like to cry on a shoulder and they won't let him that is just plain stupid. i mean he is a child and should be able to voice his emotions and deal with them in a constructive way. heck technically i understand what you mean by not understanding why they are doing this?

did they do this because of him? was he hugging too much and or did he have complaints? or is this something they are enforcing for other reasons?

this makes me a little mad at those people though, for the same reason as you. why not teach him!!!! i mean darn it, he is a kid with autism. i think it would be quite interactive to show him different examples of acceptable hugs and touchings that he can even practice and treat like homework. like he has to hug mom tonight and count to 3 before stopping? ya know? or i might just be a little heated in the thought since it seems like they are just doing what ever is easiest for them and not what is right for the kid? ya know?

i'll stop rambling, i hope there can be middle ground for your issue. lord knows a good hug can help little mike (or even myself). i know i don't prefer touch or contact with strangers because of my asperger's. but i do enjoy it at times from the ones i feel dear about.