I very rarely let myself get down but last time I did I ask Deb if my being here is worth all the hassle. She puts me in my power chair M-F around 7am, gives me a tube feeding then heads for work. She comes home for lunch, feeds me and grabs a bite for herself. Gets home around 3:30-4pm and we make it to bed around 10-11p. I ask Deb if it's worth it. She says of course it is because of all the same reasons I listed for the kids. Listening, helping talking etc... Plus I pay all the bills online. She hates writing checks and paying bills. She says she'd be lost without me. In bed at night she always touches my arm or puts my arm around her. Since I can't speak, because of my cuffed trache, I squeeze her three times ever so lightly. Three little squeezes means "I love you" and she squeezes my arm back three times. I can't die yet, my income pays the mortgage and we have 13yrs left on a 15yr mortgage! LoL