Just a hug for you and I would bet if you asked one of the mods here you
could probly
get a name change or maybe even a second screen name.we have some of the most understanding awesome mods and admins here. Alffe has some great advice I think I am gonna start calling a few folks here mom cus they are smart they care they share and they help . angel moms.

Prayers of wisdom courage strength healing and sunshine for you nohope.
PEACE
BMW