I only wish I could scan a photo of my mother (one of the last one's), that someone took of her when she was in the hospital for her emphasema.Never saw such a thing in all my life. Didn't even recognize my own mother. She lived in Florida, I lived in NYC. I would fly down several times a year, but when she collapsed, I was on the couch with sciatica.

I flew down when I was able.

When I saw her with all the oxygen tanks and she had this THING on her face, which I found out was a nebulizer, and she had to take puffs of it or something like that, and she was on SO MANY MEDS for her breathing, but the thing that stood out was that she didn't look like a woman of her age. The doctor told me Cigarettes age you, they give you wrinkles before you are supposed to have wrinkles"

Since I don't smoke I got some education that week.

But the education that I REALLY GOT was during the 7 p.m. break when many of the nurses, nurses aides and docs took their breaks out on the porch.

This was some kind of rehab nursing facility that was trying to look like a home with the central part being the nurses station.

When people came to visit their loved ones, well if fhey didn't want to go into the rooms, they could visit IN THE LIVING ROOM, with it's various couches, chairs, tv, etc. It was VERY HOMEY.

So one night it was 7 p.m. and I saw all the nurses and the aides walk out on the porch and I went with them, to socialize.

Well, absolutely each and every one of them LIT UP!!! Could have knocked me over. Really, COULD HAVE KNOCKED ME OVER!!!

I mean, these woman (all woman by the way), had just been attending my mother and others like her, with the nebulizers and oxygen tanks and the other meds that had to be dispensed. They knew about emphasema and COPD, and the other stuff.

I just stood there not believing what I was seeing, and I approached one that I had been friendly with.

I was looking at her and she said "you want to know why I'm smoking, right" And I could just nod and all she said was "I've tried, but I can't quit".

Kind of reminds me when I'm outside of Cornell waiting for the Access a ride and there are smoking booths and the doctors and nurses are smoking, and I once approached one and I said "I must ask you, you are a nurse, YOU KNOW what cigarettes do you your body, so can you explain why you are puffing away"? She laughed and HER response was "I don't want to get fat".

So I gather everyone has their own reasons for smoking. Not gaining weight, trying to quit but failing, etc. It's a vicious circle, a vicious habit and probably harder to quit than eating, or drinking, or gambling.

The tobacco companies should all be put out of business but we know that this is never going to happen.

I used to have a friend who had an obesity problem. The whole family had an obesity problem. Her daughter (who was 16 at the time), was about 350 lbs. The largest girl in her high school.

My husband and I were in our car (this was years ago, over 15 by the way). We passed by the high school and we saw all these girls smoking, and there was the LARGE one. We recognized her right away. Alan said "She's smoking?? what is she nuts??"

I got my friend on the phone and I delicately told her that I had a friend who had a daughter and that I had seen her smoke. And I didn't know whether to tell that friend or not. I was told "well, if it was my daughter, I'd want to know". So I just said "I'm talking about YOUR daughter". She didn't get it.

She said "what do you mean you're talking about MY daughter, you just said you saw someone's daughter smoking, who is it (sounded like an Abbot and Costello routine at the time).

I simply said "Alan and I saw your daughter this afternoon, at the bus stop in front of her high school, standing around with 5 other young girls and THEY ALL WERE SMOKING" I then apologized for butting in but I thought she should know.

She said "oh my god, thank you for telling me".

When I went over there the next week, I said NOTHING, It's not the way I operate. I let HER bring it up. (the girl I mean).

She approached me and said "Auntie Mel, I know you saw me smoking at the bus stop". I said "well, this is between you and your mom, and if you need help, there are patches, and other ways to quit. Now don't forget I'm talking to a 350 pound 16 year old at this time.

She said 'I can't stop, I'll get fat". I just stood there and said "you are telling me that you smoke because you don't want to gain weight"? She said 'yup, then she started eating a big bowl of macaroni and cheese".

To say that I was totally confused is putting it mildly. I then later found out that MANY girls smoke to stay thin. But this was not the case here.

So it's now 16 years later, she still smokes, and she weights over 450 lbs. Lots of addictive personality stuff going on here.

I commend anyone who even tries.

I know, in my case, (self medicating with food), I was very lucky. VERY LUCKY. Whatever made my brain get re-wired, well it is still re-wired.

I can't even think of eating after 7 p.m. any more. I guess I just replaced a bad habit with a better habit?? And I tried eating a bit of protein later on and it did not make my sugar any better the next morning. Nothing changed. I was doing much BETTER when I stopped eating after dinner. Did it for a year and had no problem. So I'm going back to that. Time will tell.

I go back to Cornell next Friday, and I know I'll see all the nurses and doctors in those smoking booths. On a cold day, I would sit in there and wait for the access-a-ride to come. Turns out, I can't breathe in that environment. So I just wait out in the cold and bundle up.

But my goodness, so many of our young people continue to smoke.

It's a hard fight.