Hugs, just wanted to say that you sound like you're in a bad way and maybe some kind words might help for a second.

Are there any organizations in your area for people with disabilities? I live in a small city of about 20,000 and there is a group here called ARISE that assists people with disabilities. Sometimes they can point me in a direction I never even thought to go in.

I'm sorry that there is no family to help and no friends nearby. I hope you find some sort of relief from some of your problems soon.

Hugsssssssss,
Weebs37