12.

Apostles? Sure, but not now.

12.

A dozen? Sure, whatever.

12 happens to be my threshold for when I think about something over and over and decide it's time to say something.

Thirty minutes ago, I stepped out of the shower and again thought of this post; that made the 12th time.

So, B2, I'm here to vehemently disagree with your conclusion. Is it worth it? You say, "no, but it will be."

I say, "Yes! It's worth it, every minute of every day!"

Here's why: I believe, firmly, that God has me here for His reasons. I believe, firmly, that my entire existence is for the glory of God and for His purpose. Yes, at times I ask Him what the heck He's thinking when things don't especially amuse me, but I also realize that, frankly, it's none of my business.

God put me here, this minute, on this day, under these circumstances because it is exactly where He wants me for His purposes. The MS is the route that He used to steer me in His direction, according to His plan. He could have used a car wreck, a fall from a ladder, a softball in the noggen, or any number of things. This time, it's MS.

Never in my life did I dream of my own children, He did not create me as the "marrying kind" and I honestly don't feel left out. I enjoy my life. My career ended suddenly and with a thud, but I am educated and have felt pulled in one direction or another to use that education for God jobs all along the way.

As long as He chooses to keep me on earth, it is entirely worth it to me to be here for His purposes.

So, YES! IT'S WORTH IT, EVERYTHING IS WORTHWHILE WHEN IT'S FOR HIS PURPOSE! Who am I? I'm that grain of sand under 500,000,000,000,000,000,000x other ones, but I belong to God and He knows my name!

When I get home, it's only gonna get better!