I posted only a couple times to this forum before, but there are so few ppl everwhere, i thought i'd say hello. You guys were very kind and welcoming to me at a time when i felt i couldn't post to the bipolar forum - for reasons which were probably blown out of proportion in my head but.... ehhhh.

i was terribly depressed between feb and june... and then ok for a bit... and (i was hoping for a little hypmania but...) now i am down again but it is partly (i THINK) a sort of slow convalescence from the depression, but also i have a ton of stressors in my life. i am moving, for one, and after almost a year of "rest" due to physical problems... i am so out of shape i get exhausted so fast. But also the move is a marker of "failure" to maintain myself, which feels horrid. i also had a break up recently, which feels horrid. i also had someone tell me awful things lately, which felt horrid. so i occasionally and unpredictably have to curl up in fetal position and cry helplessly as i feel a huge painful void inside that sucks me in.

btw, i have slept from 3 pm to 8 pm before, lol. my sleep is so screwed up, but when i feel like this - bad, stressed, anxious, or my back hurts - i have decided for now, that the best dang thing is to sleep WHEN i need it. I have the luxury(?) of not having a job - or it might be pink slip for me too, lol.

Barbara, i hope Ms. Pdoc-ess gets her act together and fixes your Effexor XR back proper. I feel for you.

Resqgirl911, boy do I ever understand stress, anxiety and their feedback loop. I had a lottt of it this last round, and right now, i have to gobble En just to avoid be paralytically overwhelmed by the packing and all else, lol. As for coworkers - yeah, they just don't get it. Normies. What do they know. Try to hang in. See if you can get a few days off. Or maybe with the cold you can get a med cert - and thus a break? (working in an ER hmmmm.... dunno, but... ?)

well, i wrote a lot more than just hello. oops. well, thanks for reading. and, again, HELLO. Also thank you for having welcomed me so warmly before. I don't believe i had expressed my appreciation at that time.

((( hugs to all )))

~ waves ~ from the bipolar forum

p.s. if any of you want to see some heart-warming pix, stop by the Bipolar Forum and check out the baby giraffe (sooo sweeet), and the laughing babies. The babies even managed to get me giggling.

~