what is pcs like for you?

to me pcs is hell literally hell
i wake up everyday hoping things will get better but they dont
i blame myself and the person that did this to me everyday but i blame mostly myself. i can barely sleep and when i do sleep i have nothing but nightmares and they feel so clear clearer then life itself. anyways i got depersonalization because of the concussion and everything looks fake and my perception of the environment has changed, everything looks so scary looking as if im in a living nightmare. not only that but my vision is messed up i have more floaters then usual and i think i might have visual snow. i feel like i have no connection to my environment or the people in it and i feel like i have no emotions. i cant seem to think right or concentrate and i have trouble remembering things that recently happened something that happened yesterday feels like it happened years ago. every day is a blur and time just passes by with barely any memory of what happened. i cant lift weights i cant watch tv i cant sleep i cant go outside i cant enjoy nothing the only thing i can do is be on the computer which is the only thing that makes me feel slightly normal.