IEP

BRING:
Tape recorder/tape/batteries
note pad
pen
copy of IEP
copy of schedules
extra folders to return

OFFER:
volunteer pt as aide to help me be on same academic page
to be supervised making sure to emmulate staff

OBJECTIVE:
If things are not being done appropriately, let's ALL get
things on track. I have no interest what so ever in finger
pointing let alone legal action, etc etc. I am eager to
grasp my son's educational life as well as you all do. I
Want to understand it, and be a part of IEP team decisions
or at least be informed of and understand the decisions
made that effect my son. I think they call that being
'in the loop'. Everyone's thoughts on that?

What will it take for his mind to just say 'Okay' when
asked a simple request such as picking up and putting
back something he dropped.

Tell staff the F-U story (without cussing).

Vince does know what I want, does know what teachers want.
He actively decides "I don't have to do what you want me
to do, I'm going to do what I want". So, he is not in the
category of child that really doesn't know what your
expectations are. However, with such a chaotic mind, and
so little practice at impulse control...I do not believe
it's as simple as typical noncomplaince. Does that make
sense, everyone agree? Other's thoughts?


TOPICS:
BEHAVIORAL:
'Behavior' is such a broad word. Can we narrow down the
biggest behavioral obstacles to work on?

For example, Vince to me acted like he's a big fish/small
pond,and needs to feel like the small (but compent) guppy
he is in a sea of experienced adults, teachers, mentors.
In what ways can we begin doing this?

What does he need to change from resistance and noncomplance
to 'okay' in his mind when adults make requests of him?
I'm thinking home and school, every area of his life -
like boot camp. Not the kind where his face is shouted in,
just the opposite. I am finally to a point as his parent,
that I CAN see him hurt, in order for him to grow.

I felt at school there was noncompliance from him that
I saw, that was more 'typical' than asd related honestly.
What do you all think?

Any chance of him spending time with the younger kids,
for reading or art, like last year? Chance to
feel competent is the purpose, plus, social time with
developmentally age appropriate peers. He just seems to
have no peer time, it's so isolating. Maybe for recess?
Can we verbalize the reasons this is so? I know there
is inappropriate behavior, but let's be speciffic. I know
last year he very much enjoyed playing with the younger
kids, than them with him. What does everyone think?

Section 504. From what I was told I'm under the impression
he spends virtually no time in regular ed. I'm not a huge
fan of section 504 being blanketed on all children. Can
we try and get him class time that will benefit him and
not impeed the learning of others. I recall in past years
other than second grade, he spend time in class unaided.

How did the whole 'hug policy' for Vince come about. How
was it turned into a no crying on lap or shoulder policy.
Leading to an high five only contanct. Tell Vincent's
interpretations about Ms. H's sleeve being more important
than his tears...I assume she was searching for a tangible
answer as to why he could not cry on her, I cannot believe
she'd really mean that. And it's very important to me she
is not made to feel badly or awkward about that. The hug
thing needs to be a PROCESS. It needs to be explained to
him matter of fact, honestly, and step by step. From what
I've been told so far, this all became an issue when he
said the word 'puberty' to Miss H. I have to say, I feel
the whole 'do not let Vince touch you' policy has felt to
me like he's being labeled a perverted deviate. He is not.
HOW is Ms. H. so 'uncomfortable' with him crying on her
sleeve? HOW did this whole thing evolve, and why was I
not allowed to talk with Ms. H. about it? I want the
truth, cause only that will make sense. Who was really
uncomfortable with Vince hugging?

Vince needs to have explained to him, his part in things
that change (such as hugs) that he doesn't like...when he
is a part of the change, such as the pinky shake. I'm never
cooth with him, I always tell him the truth - age
appropriate truth I mean.


ACADEMIC:
was adding with Mr. K. (second grade or third) a colum
three numbers, each three digits...able to carry over.
Such as 345+115+212, vertically.

Still not doing coins/money but was with Mr. K. (second
or third grade). Did know the amount of nickels, dimes,
quarters, in a dollar. Could count by 5, 10, 25 to 100.
Should we review old IEP's to see all the things he could
do, and now cannot? It's frightening. How did this happen?

Could tie shoes, not proficiently yet (with Mr. K.)
and now they are tied for him.

Is staff avoiding him having a fit, so he is becoming
sort of treated in ways to avoid him getting upset? I
understand doing that in ways that pertain to autism,
but not in a blanket way - which is easy to have happen
when you are familiar with a persons likes and dislikes.
I understand! I always find it eye opening when someone
who does not know 'vincent's rules' breaks one with him.
Often I'm very impressed with his ability to be flexible.
Equally as often, I'm not.

I'm still concerned about reading...seems to be very
slow to no increase in reading skills. Words he could
a few years ago, he stumbles over now.

What little time I observed, I was surprised at what
looked to me, to be a mind in total chaos. How did I miss
this seeing him at home? No prioritization or organization.
Like an epileptic thought process. With his behavior and
chaotic mind, as things stand now, I don't see how school
will ever be more than a glorified babysitting service. That
is not fair to him, and not fair to the adults who I know
try so hard to share and teach so much to him. How can we
get Vincent to try for staff...as hard as staff is trying
for Vincent? He could be the most fun and enjoyable kid in
the world to be around, and it's so sad and unfair to him
and staff his behavior and attitude prevent this. Does
everyone agree?

I don't want typical behavioral approaches for asd behaviors,
but I also do not want well thought out gentle approaches
for typical bratty noncomplaint attempts at manipulation.
I'd love to grasp all his behaviors all freudian style,
but I don't. Does he need some good old fashion intervention
any grandma of 10 could give us, or an autism specialist.
Or both. I think both.

I'd like nightly homework. An extension of what he is doing
currently at school. The math can be simular to Carmen's.
A step by step A-Z process. So I can see where he's at,
and see him making progress.