(cont. from above)

A few months after he passed away, a dear friend of mine(who is now known as, da wife) talked to me about how her mother and the her neighbor shared the duty of a garden every year…and I felt myself interested, wanting to learn more…I had planted a couple of things since that discovery of dirt/life. But I have always managed to kill whatever I planted…

This dear friend(da wife) lived close enough and her schedule seemed to match mine. So, we talked of a garden behind my house. Then one sunny day, we digged and dugged and dugged some more…we haul, hauled, and hauled some more…until we have a tiny veggie garden in the backyard. It was simple enough, with just 6 tomato plants, a row of soybeans, 6 eggplant plants (hard to say eggplant plants, good thing we didn't plant Piter's Pickles), and a little cilantro and spearmint bush.

After we were done that day, we watered it and when the sun’s rays gleamed down and reflect the beads of water and made our plants shined…we hugged, shouted, and yelled in ecstasy.

The plants green leaves bursting with energy, every stalk raising its head to the heavens above. And there I was, knee deep into dirt…hands deep into dirt. The worms that crawled through my hands were no longer gross…they showed signs of life. The green of the plants and its sweet aromas enlivened me inside. My heart was at another dirt house, where my father resides now, telling him what beautiful "life" my friend and I have planted. It was showing me answers…

Every week, I found myself expanding the garden. And bless my friend’s heart, she never complained and only helped. I even started to plant the front of the house with flowers and bushes. She jokingly said that I was going to turn the whole backyard into a garden. If she only knew…

The satisfaction didn’t just end on planting. Every day, I found myself out there; sweating, pulling weeds, and feeding them accordingly. I was often sad when I’d accidentally kill one or step on one…but thank goodness for my friend’s patience. She'd just say to me, “others will flourish…”

I don’t have children, but I act like an over protective father, always watering and looking outside whenever I’d get a chance. And if I see any squirrels or rabbits or moles, I would be terrified with paranoia…that they were gonna eat my kids!!! But my friend taught me to relax, to understand that is nature…I could say that my biggest fear was that I was afraid the eggplants would elope with the tomatoes without my eating them first....

And as the garden bloomed, all signs of life came about. Beautiful dragonflies I had never seen before hung around the house. All sorts of insects, good and bad came and hung around the stalks and leaves. Spiders, frogs, even toads paid visits and I’d find them throughout the yard.

I found myself finding beauty in all life…

The motley colors of different spiders that I was oblivious to before because all I wanted to do was swat them and get them out of my face, are now the catchers of the annoying mosquitoes.

The toad that had gotten a bad rap in the fairy tales, is now a prince in catching my pests.

The bees and the different dragonflies, darting from bulb to bulb as if dancing an air ballet.

The butterflies adorn the flowers with their magnificent beauty. As their wings flutter up and down and about the garden. My smile flutters with it.

Gardening has taught me about life.

Whenever I killed something, it taught me that there are others that will come to life. Whenever something was harvested, it taught me the sweetness and the satisfaction that came and after labor. It taught me that dirt not only took in the dead, it also sprouted life. Most of all, it taught me that life is a cycle. A cycle of balance. Watering is a balance, too much or too little can kill plants easily. Same thing with feeding them too much or too little.

Life amongst the insects world also taught me about life. It showed me that wherever life flourishes, it attracts another life.

A flower of an eggplant is a flower of an eggplant. It isn’t like the roses I have planted out front, but I have seen bees hung around both. There was no need for the eggplant flower to be funny or pretty to attract the bee. And the eggplant flower is just as beautiful to me as the rose.

A spider isn’t picky about where it is either, it has webs wherever the wind takes her. And it isn’t picky about her dinner. It is whatever may fly into her net.

It's shown me that I only have to be myself; that I’ll attract those that will come. I think my dad may have learned that toward the end. And in looking back, none of those friends he’s made in his life were worth anything…

There are so much to say about gardening…I am just glad to say that I am lucky to have found it earlier than I have expected, not old and decrepited.

So, to my father, who is lying in “dirt,” I know you are NOT alone…and I AM, the fruit of your labor. And I hope to prosper, bloom, and make you proud one day...

I love you, papa...