Hey all thanks for the concern, I wouldn't count yall as such wonderful friends if you weren't honest with me. Like I said I have not posted everything and I really understand everyones concern as they mirror my own. I have made it clear to him that i am not going to keep doing this, that how he did this both times was dead wrong...his attorney is the one who advised him and he is a dumbarse in my opinion,as i said I have put many many terms down that he has to go thru in order to even consider it. I will say though that part of what he is going thru I think is psychological and part physical... I am by no means making excuses, but he actually does not remember whole conversations he has had with people etc. he is going to counseling as well as to a doctor he has had severe headaches for the past 4 years and this combined with the losing conversations and not knowing he actually went somewhere is concerning to me. Well gotta run for now as I have a guy coming to the houseto work on the satellite....oh btw just in case yall are worried I am not taking care of me...I am going to therapy twice a week myself with a wonderful minister who has been a dear friend to me since I was a child.