Very insightful post David...thank you for sharing & especially for talking about it.

I'm sorry your family didn't remember this painful anniversary date but then it wasn't their father who died...when it's your time to pass, they will forever remember the date.

I can't help but wonder how much stress you are under with worrying about your painful condition in relation to what your dear father died of. I'm sure it's constantly in the back of your mind.

I'll try to "explain" myself. I guess I want it all ways. I want to make some sense out of Michael's suicide by telling people how it has changed my family...I want to plead with people to think before acting because if there are people in this world who love and are loved by you, they will be forever changed by your act.

There were complete strangers who picked me up off the floor those many years ago and "loved me" back to life. That's what forums are capable of doing. That's what this forum is trying to do.

I often have a "knee jerk" reaction and regret it later but have learned to hit that reply key because someone will say something that clicks...that will lessen the pain.

And David...what, pray tell, is a sat-nav?