Today Alan is 61 years young. He always likes to go around the corner to our favorite Japanese Restaurant and today was no exception.

Now get ready to laugh.

We order our usual lunch box, (I get Salmon) and he gets his Chicken Teriyaki.

On the table is this little stand thingee with pictures of Sushi and all various Japanese Roll thingees. The photos indicate which dish is eel, salmon, caviar, cucumber, etc. etc.

So I'm looking at this thing and I happen to come across something called a SPIDER ROLL.

I said to Alan "Alan, look, there's something here called a Spider roll. Now I order rolls all the time. I get the California Roll and the Philadelphia Roll, so I know that the chef takes some seaweed, some rice, some crab, or salmon and rolls it up, cuts it in six pieces and puts it in a small aluminum thing with low sodium soy sauce.

So I know what these rolls are.

The waitress comes over and I go "Well, I know what all these other rolls are but what is a Spider Roll?' She answers 'Spiders"

I said "I beg your pardon". She continues "yes, it's a spider".

I look at her (and there are people at the other tables watching all this unfold. Alan stops eating and he says "did you say this is an actual Spider?"

The waitress again says: "Yes, this is a spider, you know what a spider is don't you??"

I looked at her and I said "Are you out of your mind, we kill spiders in this country, and YOU EAT THEM???"

She again looks at me and says: 'Don't you like spiders?" Whereupon the guys at the adjoining table dropped their sushi and started laughing their heads off. I'm not seeing what is so funny, because this waitress is telling me that they offer Spiders on the menu. Alan wasn't laughing either.

So I point to the actual picture of the Spider Roll (with stuff sticking out of it) and I said "This is a spider??" and again, she says "What do you have against Spiders??"

I then said (I'm not kidding, this is exactly what I did).

I stood up and I said "we kill spiders, we don't eat them, if I see a spider on the floor, I'll do this, AND I TOOK MY FOOT AND BASHED IT ON THE FLOOR.

She burst out laughing and said 'no no, this is King Crab, we just call it SPIDER".

Well, I think the whole restaurant started laughing at me.

I thought they had spiders on the menu.

Good Lord!! lol