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Magnate
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 2,871
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Magnate
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 2,871
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Picking up pieces
Grom,
I am sure glad that your road is taking this new lane of travel. When dealing with the huge year you had, escape is often a need rather then the desire. I did want to pass on a thought thought about trying to do it yourself.
When things several years ago were so overwhelmed dealing with De's injury, my injury at work that robbed my loved career, I ahd to start over and did not even know it.
I had noticed an ad in the paper for a psychirtrist that dealt with chronic pain patients. The focus is that people dealing with these issues have different needs of creating a new life and morning the loss one, then someone in crisis without the physical problems that go along. It is a different pair of eyes you see and legs you travel, with contributing factors that these professionals understand.
Doc Jim was amazing, I did not know I had to let go of my old life, I didn't want to, I wanted it back. I had to go through two years of one deciding to go back to school, then doing it to see there was another life for me.
I didn't want it, but after time I saw it was better. Who wants to at 50 years old and many obligations be out at midnight on horrid life threatening calls. I did for a long time, but see it is time to pass that on to the younger...going into a field that instead I can be an instructor, sharing a life of experiance instead.
My point is, I did what I could on my own to try and glue the pieces together, but long term realize it was a weight off my shoulders to let someone else take it from me, give me permission to "get a life" and they would carry the burden, Guiding me to the life ahead. My glue was like liking an envelope with out the sticky on it, just fell apart.
Tragically, doc Jim was killed in a car accident just feet from his home many years ago. I never got to show him how I took the permission and went back to school excelled, and even work a little. Even if I did not work, I feel great I did it, that degree is something no one can ever take away from me!
It feels great at work, to be told good job, or recognize something I contributed made a huge affect on the case I was working.
From an unconsoable child to be playing wonderfully when an anxious parent returned, to a terminated vist, being told by the child, "mommy, sit here, wait I am playing". (I supervise monitored vistis between child and abusers, sexual and physical) The head of the organization came over to me and thanked me for doing something I did as second nature.
Enough about me, what I want to share with many of us in stressful lifes; need to know we can morn, find a new direction incorporating the new limitations and changes into something worthwile and good. Small or big.
Even your step daughter has to learn, maybe through her own life experiance that life is going on, and changes don't have to be bad, but what we make of them can benefit us.
Good that you have us and we have you here our friend,
Di
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