Dear Donna,
That is good news about the surgery.
It sounds like you are teaching him how you want to be treated and you have decided that you want to be treated better. I hope that he is paying attention.
Here's a youtube clip. The stuff about relationships starts on minute 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d785B_y0WSo
Ask Victoria: We Teach People How To Treat Us
Keep talking here to us.
Mari