I will lose my employer paid health benefits on 12/31/08. It scares me to death to think about what I'm going to do after they're gone. No private company would insure me at a rate that I could afford living on SSDI. And COBRA is over $600 a month - and I can't do that either.

I've worked since I was 16 years old. Only taking a few years off to have my 2 children.

I asked Shared Solutions how much they are billing my insurance company for my Betaseron and I think she told me it was about $1,900 a month. I nearly choked! She told me not to worry - they will provide it for me for free if I am on SSDI. I'm sure there's a qualifying process to go through.

Now that prescription meds are easier to come by with the Prescription Assistance Programs I'm not so much worried about my meds as I am my ability to go to the doctor of my choice - preferably the ones I'm seeing now - and being able to afford the office visits. I'm told you can negotiate with the office staff for an affordable charge although I've never done that before.

I will have no choice but to accept Medicare and Medicaid once (and if) I am approved by SSDI. I don't see anything wrong with that - I paid into the system for years just so I would have the benefit of the services should I need them.