Thanks everyone, I don't know what happened, well I do, but I'm ready to tell all. I see my pdoc tomorrow and I told her it's time. She's probably even more relieved than I am because she's going to be on vacation until August 2nd and won't have to worry about me holding it in anymore.

The first thing I do in the morning when I get up is get coffee and Hooper and go outside to fill the bird feeders and clean the bird bath. And then I looked up, and in front of me, at the end of this section of ivy is a lone "Shoo Fly" plant.

My mom and I always went to a lot of flower shows and she found seeds for this plant. In her loving care they ripened and sowed them everywhere in her garden. She was delighted and told me I needed some in my garden, as she, in her giddy, funny way sung:

"Shoo fly don't bother me,
Shoo fly don't bother me,
Shoo fly don't bother me,
'cause I belong to somebody..."

I was shocked when I saw this because I hadn't seen any for a couple years. I had to have all the English ivy cut down and had someone kill off all the poison ivy in there. It grew back but never did I see the Shoo Fly plant again. And then I turned around and there was my very first Rose of Sharon of the year. The one that my mom and I planted one week before she died. One of the things she always said to me was, "I will see you in the moon, the stars and the sun". It was a powerful image that left me with the impression she would always be around in one form or the other.

The wind picked up and I thought I heard her voice saying "It's time honey". I know I heard it, I'm not delusional. I felt Mom brush up against me as I walked by...and I swear I heard, "...cause I belong to somebody". I know this was my mom talking to me, telling me it will be okay.

And Curious I know what I'll be humming all night long, Follow the Yellow Brick Road