After having my experiance with my daughter, I felt so alone then, I just have this hyper emotion to wish the mental health field was what it should be. For Al Anon, I would only be guessing, but when a family has a member in crisis they must have a program to help us; structure, understanding our emtions, how help those we love.

That was my battle and anger the lack of real answers adn families with lack of support and winging it day to day living with stress and wanting so terrible bad to make the loved one have improvement.

When in crisis and calling for an ambulance, police, co-workers, showed up, jumped restrained, beat and threw in a crusier where she kicked a window i had to pay for. From my training, you have to handle things completly opposit. even if they told her, you know your Mom is a pain in the butt with you, you need a friend, what is it we can help you with.

I saw a mom and daughter in crisis outside my own psych appoint last week and just walked over to the gal while mom talked to see what they could do. From my professional experiance I realized she was in crisis and would not be OK for Mom to drive in a car alone. She could jump out adn likely would. so I sat and talked with ehr. she said I don;t know you what the hell do you want. I said nothing. I saw there was upset family and remember when I had a problem and no one listened and my daughter said we hated her and said it was all her fault, it wasn't. That I have a f's up problem, I am going to lsoe my job, and could use a friend. Even if a few minutes. did she want a piece of gum adn sit in my car. She asked if I could take ehr to lunh. I said if we can;t do it today I would love to do that. I feel like for some reason i was in that parking lot and we should be friends. She said why, I said why not.

I saw the PD a coworker that showed up and he understood my signal to stay back, and Mom to stay back. I told her I think that people were worried about ehr medications being screwed up and did she think so. She said there were things that everyone blamed her. We talked and I said not long ago I made the same call to help my daughter and it did not go well. That because she was not cooperative they jumped her and handcuffer her took her dignity.

I said to her they were my friends I use to drive the ambulanc, the girls name was Dianne like mine. I really would love to be a friend, and she is the best person take control of her situation. be brave and keep her dignity. Could she walk to the ambulance adn let Dianne take her down and get things figured out. (She was in law school when this flared) She smiled at me, asked for my gum and walked to the ambulance.

I was in the process of working with NAMI on certification for instructing police in handling responses to families with a crisis. The family needs someone, not a cop beating retrianing or escalating a good chance at de escalting the situation. Just be himan and care for heavens sake. Let people ahve their dignityl
When them came to my call, they charged my daughter down in the front yard I heard a lound BANG, I thought they shot her. It was a rock she threw in her car window because when I called for ambulance assist, I thought if they drove us down instead she would be calm and not jump out. Instead they escalated it and made me pee my pants in fear! I thought they killed her until I got down there.
I still will finish my training, it is a need law enforement and first responders need.
Sorry to get off topic, but I miss my daughter and if someone really cared, and really helped before she was dischaged without a plan or help she would still be alive. They gave her meds she was highly allergic to, I had her home one day.

I feel and totally understand and have such compassion for those in the mist of the life we live with challanging problems.
My prayers for you and hope that somewhere if it is Al Alnon, you find support and the one thing that helps.
But I care, know that
dianne