I had 6 reoccurrances of encephalitis which did major damage to the "pain center" of my brain. Without narcotics life is unbearable. However with the implantation of an intrathecal pump with Dilaudid, I finally had a life. But until Lyrica, my neuropathic pain was still a major problem. But it cleared up excruciating dystonia, and even though I still have a lot of pain, I am able to lead a nearly normal life which is new to me in the past 27 years. I'm driving, doing shopping and enjoying my family. So as I write this, I am realizing that the pettiness of how I look isn't so much to lose.

I had been a size 20 from steroid treatments, and now I'm creeping back up, losing my figure and going up from a size 8 to a 12 in just a couple of months. I know what it's like when it is hard to move around because of excess weight. I never wanted that again. But here I go again. Do any others of you struggle with some of the same feelings? My family says if it was them, they'd go with the extra weight. Me too. But then the vanity bug gets me again.

Can anyone relate?
Joanne: