sorry misti,

getting the dx is always a kind of shock whether you expect it or not.
you can talk to us and say all that's on your mind, we won't scatter. we will understand and support you.

i don't blame you for your fears. can you talk to your dr about your feelings?
and how about some therapy?

therapy has helped me very much. i can say whatever i want whether is makes sense or not. it's the way i feel. then i don't scare any of my friends or family. and a lot of times they want to be so + with me that it stifles my attempt to get my real feelings out and validated.

good luck misti.
we're here for you.