Dear Michael,
When I gave up work in 2005 I did so for exactly the things you describe, I so hated not being able to be the perfectionist person I once was, and remember a work colleague getting really cross with me when I described myself as 'unviable'. But that is what I was, and to an extent still am. I no longer allow myself to be the driven person I once was, and am a lot happier. I use the feelings that arise as a support for meditation, which I never really 'got' before, and try to work with them - this year my son helped me make a vegetable garden, it grows lots of weeds, which I can't deal with,but also has given a great crop of beans, peas and courgettes, which I can. It helps. Letting go of the person I once was has opened up a space in which I can be viable, in a different way. I don't compare things too much. Someone once said to me that not being able to do things well gives other people an opportunity to develop compassion - but I do get grumpy when they try! I am the one who devalues me, and then get angry when I feel devalued!

I allow all my feelings, but they are simply that, feelings, they are not me. And I don't try to be what I think others expect me to be. That can help open a space where I can be viable........

I might have missed the mark completely, if so please ignore......

I know you to be a reflective person from your many posts here and elsewhere. Your worth, Michael, is probably not the issue, it is self-worth that is the real ******! You are not of value because of what you do, but who you are....

Blessings
Lindy