I'm really sorry to hear this, WH! I really can't offer any great advice, but I can say that I will keep you and your kids in my prayers and I am here to listen when you need to vent. That's one of the great things about NT; we are all in need of emotional support at one time or another and the members here really care.
I know we all have our beliefs and I totally respect that, but I have a feeling that the Lord is w/you. Remember the verses from Footprints in the Sand, as the words totally ring true.
take care WH and please come here often and let us know how you are doing.