A few members of the forum have been talking about spirituality and how it helps [ in all areas of life] them cope with this wretched condition. My faith has suffered from my years of advocacy and being on the internet. Advocacy has kept me very busy and completely distracted from the word that used to guide me quite a bit.

I have a need to return to that word, and have reflected on it a lot during a beautiful 3 weeks spent in the Pacific northwest. My brother lives in Seattle and I talked with Rosebud, spent time with Carey and another friend from Portland who was a GDNF trial participant. I met several times with Bill Bell, of the Northwest Parkinson Foundation and went to an excellent support group meeting - what smart, nice movers and shakers. I wonder if some are here - I know Dave A. was there.

It's hard not to reflect on things of faith when in the mountains walking back to a cirque in the woods with my new walking stick, a gift from Bill. The solitude and magnificent beauty brings out the most peaceful inner parts of our souls - which is what makes us different from a dog, or a horse.

PD and advocacy took me to great places and I met wonderful people. But in the end, I am an advocate in nature of the kind described by Susan B. Anthony in Carey's signature line. I tried playing by others' rules, looking the other way at half truths; and it's not me. Getting older and sicker magnifies the transparency and self serving in worldly goals and behaviors, rendering them meaningless.

I can't muster up the hatred that is being created for Sarah Palin. We are told to honor our leaders, and then we will be honored. I'm not responsible for their success or failure; I am responsible for how I am honored in the end.

What is my point? I don't really have one. I really like Carey's signature line, and recognize how much is wrong with the world because of people who are afraid and have priorities that will never fix the problems.

By the way, someone needs to start a campaign to make churches more accessible to the handicapped. They surely aren't. Do they consider us a distraction? bigger sinners cause we're sick? But I digress.

may as well ramble, nothing much else going on; take care of yourselves first,

paula