Quote:
Originally Posted by Franny
Hi, I have "talked" to some of you in the past but haven`t been here in a while. It`s 2:30 in the morning and having trouble sleeping as usual. Been suffering from boo hoos and having trouble leaving the house. I haven`t been able to cry for a long time and now I cry over little things. Well almost everything, especially "dog" commercials when that certain song comes on I have to turn the channel. It`s the one about dogs needing homes and they have such sad faces! Alot of other dumb stuff too. I am going to therapy Saturday to figure this one out. Actually it`s been a long time since I have been able to cry. That started when I lost my Dad 9 years ago. He was my best friend. Now I can`t seem to turn off the water works! Also has anyone had trouble with people forgetting about your disease and the fact you aren`t the same person anymore? For everyone else it`s "business as usual" and they have pretty much have forgotten about your pain and expect you to do things you just can`t anymore. Even my hubby asks how I am when I he gets home from work. Tonight I said I am in pain just like I usually am ( becomes ALOT worse when I try to do housecleaning or laundry) , I said I am like this every night but I don`t sit here and tell you about it all the time because it doesn`t make any difference. He said, well that`s true. (Waste of time trying to get some understanding about how I feel.) Wow, that one hurt! He really doesn`t seem to understand. Anyway sorry to go on, I just had to vent. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you. Thanks for letting me get this out. (Guess I will climb down off the pity pot for now, I don`t want to fall in!) besides I know most of you have this disease ALOT worse than I do.
God Bless and much love to all of you,
Franny
|
Hi Franny,
I hope you don't mind if I join in your pity party for a bit.If I fall in I promise to clean up the mess.LOL
I am sorry about the boo hoos and very sorry about your loss of your Dad.
I have not been able to cry for a long time myself I think I just know that if I start I may not quit.I can live with the pain of the diseases I have but the fact that my 26 year old daughter took my grandson we helped raise from a baby until he was 6 and moved in with a man who keeps them away from everyone in what used to be our close family really hurts and for me that was when I stopped crying and stopped living too.
It's been 3 years now and we have seen them 4 times for about 30 minuets at a time.Her fiance is an acoholic , drug abuser and can't keep a job.
I am just now ready to start trying to live again.I don't go anywhere just can't make myself,don't have any friends,really miss my daughter and grandson so much it has killed a part of me its like we lost 2 kids.I know it's not the same they are alive and well (I pray) across town but they are gone out of our lives and it hurts real real bad.I was very close to my daughter before the boyfriend/fiance, now she won't even call to tell me they moved or were evicted.I only know this because my grandsons stepmother keeps me informed a little she has a heart thank goodness.
Sorry to whine and boo hoo to you but misery needs company I think....
Okay enough of that.
Let me know how it goes on Saturday It sounds like maybe you never allowed yourself to greive the loss of your Dad and it's determined to come out at any moment.Or maybe it's hormonal,but I am sure you have already thought of that.
and yes everyone forgets we are in pain its the only good thing about pain when you are not in it you don't think about it or even how someone with it may feel.I am sorry you don't have more understanding my hubby tries to but he doesn't really understand either.
Lots of Luck on Saturday
I will be thinking about you and sending prayers your way
Denise