((Chemar)) thank you for the link

((Earth Angel)) I too posted to you in your other thread.
My heart goes out to you. When I read what your Mom
wrote, I just burst into tears. We love them so much!!
But, we don't want them in that kind of pain either... so tragic

I forgot to mention in the other post, it is so easy to
blame ourselves. I wrote several posts here, asking the
same thing.. was I the one that pushed him over the
edge? I have been disabled since 99, and had recently
had a TIA stroke that left me partially paralyzed...
I no longer blame myself. In time, I hope you will be able
to see through the pain to KNOW you were in no way
to blame!

I will share with you something a friend of mine shared with me.
He is a minister. He said he and some other members of the
church where at a friends house, as he was on suicide watch.
They had taken every "weapon" out of the house, they stayed
with him 24/7 Yet, he still found a way to take his life. There
simply was nothing anyone could have done. I'm not sure why
that helped me so much.. perhaps because it eased my feelings
that there was something.. anything that I could have....
should have done...

I do hope you will come and share with us. Sometimes it
helps to know you are not alone in your pain. I have 6
brothers and sisters, we all handled the loss differently,
there is no right or wrong way to grieve. One brother
couldn’t come to Dad's service.. that was right for him.
Me, I tried to be strong for everyone... I couldn't handle
the pain, so I tried to block it... and ended up in the hospital
having a break down. Let your emotions come freely, let us
try to help you through them.
Again, my thoughts and prayers are with you Nikki