I know it is hard to not focus on the negatives but there could be a lot of benefits you recieve. I am not trying to sway you one way or the other. I would encourage you to talk to your doctors about your fears and concerns. I have been on both those meds before and am a younger one here. Before this health issue I had tried many meds for mental health issues at a young age 18. It does not have to be forever. Try to take one day at a time. Who know you may feel much better mentally and physically and that will help you feel better taking them.On a side note please reach out for support in real time if you get desperate and you feel unsafe. I am not sure what that meant in your post. Things can get better. You have to hold to hope. You can email me too if you want a buddy.