hi summertime,
it is okay to whine here a bit and vent here--where else will people understand? but I also want to tell you that it does get hard some days, yes, but it also gets easier other days, and it is worth it to slog through the ickier days because the better days are SO worth it..
I don't know mcuh about the SCS and what treatment is best for you, but I can tell you that pain can get better, and that there are places to make peace with the pain that's left, and I hope you are having better days now.
hang in there, for watever it is worth, you're not alone,
annie