Beth I had a Gr Uncle that said the same thing about his "Whiskey". He lived to me 94 and passed of Cancer.
I can stand to drink Whiskey.... but it is still a great idea!
That is great of you to put your feelings aside to your son to see your grandsons - and I am sure they missed you and sounds like you all had a wonderful time!
Maybe sitting beside you at the party is a first step with your son. Since he is your son I am sure in time he will talk to you!
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Tough Times Don't Last ~ Tough People Do
Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be NO courage unless you're scared.