What lovely people you all are. Thank you so much for your care and advise. I REALLY battled this morning with the depression and made myself get out of the house with a mission to look for a job, secretarial, its what I used to do even when the kids were little but havent been in the office for some 5 years! So........I have to do something for me, and working provides me with an outlet and some fulfilment in life. Childcare after school is a bit tricky so have contacted some agencies.........heck I have made a start. I am so pleased I have because I can't carry on feeling like I have been.

best wishes to you all.